Our world is unhinged. How do we respond to the mental health crisis now visible everywhere?
Never before have I witnessed such a pandemic of paranoia and anxiety. Screens are in everyone’s face. No one is talking to each other like they did.
Even the business world is susceptible.
Recently, a Springfield small business owner reached out to me, showing interest in my news blog. He offered technical skills I don’t have, and we formed an informal partnership, reaching out to local businesses for advertising and web hosting services.
We spent time at coffee shops, as he set me up on his own dedicated server and I gave him free pizza codes from Papa John’s where I also work. I even took him to several social activities with my wife and again with another friend to Silver Dollar City. All on me. I had some free passes. He didn’t have transportation, so I drove him around without charge.
Meanwhile, he offered customers free reviews and technical support far beyond anyone I’d ever seen. A super generous and caring business owner.
But within two weeks, the guy unhinged a barrage of bizarre behaviors and permanently sabotaged our connection. His threats included legal action and outright false accusations. Each text message was compounded with negative suppositions and ultimatums.
In retrospect, the young man mentioned a horrific past and emotional triggers. Apparently, he wasn’t comfortable with a non-toxic relationship and didn’t know how to manage a healthy connection. At least, that’s my nonprofessional opinion.
This wasn’t the first time
I’d seen it before, about 20 years ago, while working for a man in a credit card processing company. The guy offered solutions no one else did, helping customers like never before, just like the guy I met recently. At first, it was amazing helping a guy so creative in serving customers that were being ignored by bigger companies. That’s also what I loved about the more recent guy, too.
But the older guy began telling more outlandish stories. Nothing made sense. He’d call at odd times. I later learned was a chronic liar and alcoholic. He was cruel to his wife, a former acquaintance of mine.
His idle threats and sinister behavior (he is older than I) made my skin crawl. Shocking to hear such venom from a “business owner.” Talked of sending me away in handcuffs, etc. Nothing made sense. I stopped seeing him altogether amid a barrage of accusations and angry threats via text.
Mental health today
What can we do about improving mental health? Why are so many people absorbed in anxiety and depression?
One way is to spend more time in nature.
Click here for an article about that.
I have another friend who is older. He, too, faces mental health challenges with depression and anxiety. However, he is a long term retired professional, has money, a loving wife, active in church and community, and you’d never know what he faces internally.
Reminder to us all
Look for ways to brighten someone’s day. Maybe they all can’t put down the screens and work outside. Although they should. Encourage others to do so. Urge them. “Put down your phone, step away from the screen, go talk to someone older or tend a garden. Do an art project, take a walk in nature, help a neighbor, meet new friends.
Risky business
Meeting new people is a favorite passion of mine. I reach out almost daily to someone I don’t know. At Hy-Vee on Sunshine recently, I noticed a young lady wearing heels. That’s rare and I appreciate the fashion sense. I approached her to compliment her, and noticed she was crying.
“Are you OK?” I asked.
She wiped a tear. “I’ll be alright; just having a tough day,” and a fresh set of tears came. “Do you need a hug?” I felt my fatherly compassion. She nodded and smiled as I hugged her.
“What do you need?” I asked.
“I just ordered and paid for my food, but the people at the counter all walked away and I don’t know where to get my food.”
She had a ticket for the hibachi grill and I gently informed the young lady they would prepare it down at the nearby grill where she could pick it up.
I gave her some pizza discount codes and she thanked me.
The next day, I was at the mall and there she was, working. She hugged me and remembered my kindness. She later gave me her number and said her husband was working in the oil fields, and that she would love the company of my wife and I since she has few contacts or friends. She admitted to being anxious and socially apprehensive. She is 26, same age as my oldest son, and my heart went out to her. I invited her to a few events with my wife and I, and this morning, her husband text messaged me to never contact her again.
It’s a reminder that no matter how well your intentions, someone will misinterpret your kindness or reject your offers.
Another professional woman was on my simulcast show years ago. Her husband recently committed suicide and left her with the children. Prior to his passing, he messaged me not to contact her or comment on her posts. She is outgoing and banters with everyone. It’s hard when people are jealous or full of fear and apprehension. Life is uncertain. But the young widow keeps a smile and positive attitude. She has cut off communication with me, but I’m glad she has a wonderful support group, unlike my more recent male and female acquaintances mentioned above.
Don’t stop trying
I will continue to try to reach out to strangers with good intentions and be more aware of how they may see me as a potential intruder. It’s hard for suspicious people to accept generous, kind people, and it won’t always be a win, but the effort is always worth it!
Johnny Rooster is a unique man with the ability to talk to anyone. He publishes the Christian County Trumpet to give people something to think about.